Best name of a witness to a mall stabbing, ever. (or: "Happiness Is a Wam Gun.")

Irina Slutsky. Sorry Rus/Ukraine-philes, but it's good one.

Apparently, she was doing her part for the economy a few years back at the more up-scale indoor mall, near to where I grew up, when a knife wielding black woman started stabbing rich (presumed) white women. Can anyone say relative deprivation? I suggest we deal with the increasing wealth asymmetry before no white woman is safe to stroll the climate-controlled halls of capitalism.

Don't remember how I found this, but the story was posted on a pro-gun discussion board. Like with any violent attack that makes headlines, NRA folks feel the need remind us that if only helpless Ms. Slutsky had been packing, at least some of the carnage would've been avoided. Poor Irina, she'll never be able to lie awake at night with the warm, cozy feeling that she killed (or maybe just wounded) a, most likely, mentally disturbed individual. Damn you MD liberals!

George of the Jungle

Don't ask why. According to Smithsonian's Human Origins Program, and after checking a few other places, the consensus seems to be that the first woman, the mother of us all lived a little less than 200,000 years ago, in Africa. First, I didn't know the Smithsonian had such a program. After that sank in, and remembering that the Smithsonian is a federally funded institution, I thought it a bit incongruous that not far from the National Mall downtown is another federal building where the President of the United States lives. Despite the venerable, old buildings dedicated to "science" and "reason," our dear, simple Bush believes that all that evolution stuff is just a bunch of bull-puckey (i.e., hooey). Although, perhaps he's not "touched" (i.e., retarded) as much as uninformed. Not stupid but unintelligent. In which case, I recommend Jr. makes a visit to the National Museum of Natural History. I went there throughout my childhood and found it very informative. The big displays and models really drive home things like carbon dating that books and TV leave flat and unstimulating. Well, George, get stimulated.

Hooked

An interesting step on the path to understanding the physiology of addiction, here in The Economist, which can hopefully influence drug policy reform as well as future treatment alternatives. Only once addiction and drug abuse/use are understood as functions of both environmental and biological factors can we begin to alleviate the damage done communities and individuals--in part because of an uninformed bias among different substances, and the arbitrary moral distinctions that follow.

Jumping through hoops.

Now they've really gone and done it. The Clinton's have proved via the presidential medium that men and women are different, sexual stereotypes are true, and that people like it that way. Swollen-eyed and of shaky voice, poor Hillary finally caved under the pressure. After years of subverting the gender role, she got girly. Things weren't going her way, so she pouted. On TV. In front of the world. She's running for president. Of the United States. Of America. Can you imagine Ron Paul doing that? Not that I would mind. (I'm just trying to piss off his "enthusiastic" supporters.)

But here's the awesome part: it totally won her New Hampshire primary. Big time. Apparently women who were against, undecided, or weren't even gong to vote came out in droves for their girl. When have you ever heard Hillary referred to as a girl? (OK, my father doesn't count.) All weekend long, most coverage was about the first black president. I was getting kinda misty, myself. Left over were two underdogs, real man of the people populist--supposedly real this time--and the beginnings of a Clinton pity-party. Misty again, over here.

Just as Clinton the first filled the, cough, big shoes of the philandering, smoking, musician stereotype and only became more popular, Jr. has just surged in popularity in not the most establishment friendly of states. For not even crying, almost crying. What would've happen if she had cried? I think the whole state would've voted for her. Hell, I'd have voted for her.

It sure was effective. I were a scenic, I'd say this perhaps not so authentic display was her trump card she's been holding onto since her run at senator that she didn't have to play in New York. Until now, "The Heartbreak in Iowa." Even so, maybe she didn't really want to use it. Maybe she'd hoped she wouldn't have to, ever. Maybe a piece of me hoped that too. But hey, maybe that's not why she won, right?

I hear Obama plays a good game of hoops.